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I have three brothers and three sisters. My mother and father divorced when I was very small, so I don't remember my father being around while I was growing up. But I do remember all the boyfriends my mother had, some more than others. I was molested by one of them. My life from then on is kind of a blur. I was withdrawn, lonely and scared. Some of these men were abusive towards my mom. So we moved a lot going from house to house and school to school. Always running from something or someone, looking for some kind of peace or security.
At one of these houses we lived in, a kindly old lady named Mrs. Block. She would take us smaller ones to church. That was short-lived as it was time to move again.
Mother sent us smaller ones to a Bible camp when I was eleven. That's where I heard about Jesus really for the first time I remember. I gave my heart to Jesus at one evening service. But when I got home there was no talk about Jesus; life went on pretty much as it had before.
The next seven years of my life got worse. I met the father of my girls, and started smoking dope, quit high school and then got pregnant. Our relationship ended ten years later.
I was 28, and went to the bar scene, leaving my girls with sitters or alone. The oldest was only nine. I was having a great time, so I thought. There I met another man, whom I married three years later.
Our marriage was a little better than my previous relationship, the drugs were still there and we were fighting more. He would stay at work late. One evening I waited up for him late, and he came home and told me he was leaving and didn't love me any more. It felt like he had kicked me in the stomach. After he left, I laid on the floor crying for hours!. All the pain and hurt I had caused, and that was inflicted on me came together. I contemplated ending my life, but was such a coward.
In the morning I called my sister, who cried with me, and shared Christ with me. She'd been saved several years earlier, but I was too stubborn to listen. Now where else was I going to go? What else was I going to do?
I made a decision to let Jesus live the rest of my life. I knew He could do a better job. The Holy Spirit started working in my heart and life. I was baptized a year later. Romans 6:4. I have become a new creation in Christ. The old is gone behold all things become new! This year my husband came to Christ and we are together again; I'm working as a corrector at WTM, and we are ready to go where God leads.
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